First Sono Moved to Today!

So I will have my first early OB sono today instead of three days from now thanks to the sharp pains I'm having on my left side kinda near my left hip bone. I called my IVF coordinator first thing this morning and left a detailed message for her. When she called me back about two hours later the first words out of her mouth were, " You need to come in today. The doctor wants to see you." So I'm excited to see what they will find in my uterus, but I'm worried about what they may find in my fallopian tube. I'm 6 weeks and 3 days today. Lets hope our little bean's heart is already beating! I'm so nervous! But excited at the same time! Almost like I could throw up!  My appointment is at 3:00pm today. The Hubs will be joining...and against my request will be video recording me during the sonogram. You don't want to be video recorded when you could get good OR bad news. It's too nerve wracking!

Let me set the stage...

I literally thought I might throw up from anxiety and anticipation while I was sitting in my RE's waiting room waiting to be called back. One minute seemed like forever. I kept saying to my husband, " O.M.G. on the wait...how long can it take??!!" He had to of said at least five times, " Babe, it's been like two minutes, take some deep breathes." The anticipation was killing me. I wanted to know if they could see anything in my left fallopian tube and, more importantly, what was in my uterus!! Literally, my heart was racing with anticipation.

Fortunately we were in and out of there in like 30 minutes.  I was almost afraid to look at the sono screen once the process began.  I boycotted my husband from video recording this visit. He was very disappointed. But I was so anxious in the moment, I felt having the video camera on me would have been too overwhelming should we have gotten less than ideal news.


Drum Roll.....

As soon as I was violated by the probe, there it was, our baby, dead center. It looked like a blobby white jelly bean but it sure was beautiful. The doctor then said, " Do you see that, that little flicker?" So we both concentrated at the screen and there it was, our baby's heartbeat. He turned on the sound so we could hear our babies beautiful heart beating at 125 bpm. Our bean measured about 7.6 mm today.  It was an amazing moment. So incredibly surreal.

Another good note, nothing was seen in my left ovary or fallopian tube, all looked normal.  He said that it would have been a very long journey given where our current baby is implanted ( multiple embryos usually stay close together and implant very near one another) for the second embryo to have made it up to the fallopian tube. Lets hope he is right! Thank God for the good news today!

                  See the black circle, and then the white blob in the center of the black circle, well the white blob is our baby inside of the amniotic sac ( black circle).
Per the RE's dates, 6w4d, 125 BPM, 7.6mm, Due Date: 3/30/12

However, I was slightly bummed that I didn't do or say all of the things I had planned to do or say after seeing our baby on screen for the first time. I had envisioned so much happening in that exam room while seeing our baby on screen!  It was like I was kind of numb, kind of not really all there. It was the wildest moment. Of course, we both were all smiles and insanely happy, but there was no tears. ...yea, I said it, NO TEARS! Can you believe it!

After discussing it later in the car, my husband and I realized that unlike those who haven't had a journey down infertility lane, we have become desensitized to all things pregnancy or baby related in some regard. It's like we've talked about every single aspect of everything having anything to do with getting pregnant, staying pregnant, or baby, that it's not new anymore. I know it sounds really odd that we didn't throw a crying party in the exam room today, but in some weird way, it kinda felt like nothing new...EVEN THOUGH IT WAS SOMETHING NEW!  That was a shocking discovery today. It's like we have lost our "getting pregnant" innocence. It was disappointing. So sad this journey has changed us in this way.

So, no, it's not twins, which we both secretely hoped for, but that's okay. God knows best. Who knows why we didn't have twins this time around but it was obviously for a greater divine purpose. So we are over the moon with our seemingly perfect little bean growing away!

I will go back in one week for a follow-up sono to make sure I am not having any more pain, which the doctor seems to think is nothing more than increased blood flow into the uterus, and to mark the growth progress of the baby. After that, we will be released to our REGULAR O.B. ...like a normal pregnant woman! Seems odd seeing as nothing about our journey to get here has been "normal". :)